Chainsaw to the Face: The Ultimate Ranking of the GEARS OF WAR Games
NO OTHER LIST MATTERS
If you have been following the plot of this Substack for the last year, you know that I (and Mitch via the podcast) have been revisiting the Gears of War series. I have read all but 2 of the novels and replayed the games. This has resulted in posts, podcasts and an interview with Karen Traviss. It’s been a joy to examine the older games with more context, development history and nostalgia. When we had to tackle the newer entries again, boy, were the warts larger. The one good thing to come out of the new regime for the Gears-franchise is Gears Tactics (even if it suffers from pacing issues).
Now that I have fully injected the series in my brain for the last year, I thought it would be worth it to rank the series in order of favorite to least favorite. I don’t think this is a list to rock the boat and I feel that other lists would be similar but hey, where else can I get my thoughts down?
GEARS OF WAR 2 (2008) 5 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancers
What an absolute masterpiece. Even all of these years later (many years later), I’m impressed with the scope, moment to moment gameplay and over the top setpieces. The game barely lets the player get comfortable in any level before throwing them into the next scenario. Whether it’s cutting your way out of a giant-ass worm or being in the center of Jacinto as it sinks, Gears of War 2 is a marvel of video game development. Gears of War and Halo are franchises with similar trajectories as IPs and the comparison will come up again - but Gears of War 2 did exactly what Halo 2 did. These sequels elevated the gameplay of their predecessors and expanded on the lore established. Each allowed for the set up of a third game with high stakes and dramatic outcomes for their main characters.
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GEARS OF WAR 3 (2011) 4 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancer
I’ll be honest, when I first played Gears of War 3 years ago, I did not click with it. I was confused with the game’s setup, cinematic approach (slower moments and character development), and death of a main character. It wasn’t until reading the books by Karen Traviss in the last year that I appreciated the writing and direction of 3. I still don’t think it’s my favorite game to PLAY but it has become my 2nd favorite game due to the way it ties the whole story together. If you read the novels, you would know WHY the game starts on a ship and WHY Anya is JACKED now. You would also have been informed on Marcus’ and Dom’s relationship as well as their childhoods. Those books added to the experience and Traviss’ oversight on the story of Gears of War 3 tied those novels in brilliantly. I know we would’ve wanted more Gears if it stopped here but boy, if they just stopped here, what an incredible constrained multimedia project this would’ve been. But alas, money needs to beget money and we have had a complicated relationship with the series ever since.
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GEARS OF WAR (2006) 4 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancers
Cliffy B’s masterpiece that started it all. What started as an idea in the Unreal franchise moved over to a tech demo (sorta) for the Unreal Engine 3 and the soon to arrive Xbox 360. Throwing chainsaws on guns and an underground creature invasion, Cliff ended up with a gothic horror shooting game that changed 3rd person shooters forever. Introducing the cover mechanic as a do-or-die part of the experience, almost every similar game for YEARS used the same approach to gun fights (including Grand Theft Auto 4). I played the Ultimate Edition of Gears of War (a remastered version, I guess) recently and was again pleasantly surprised. Epic Games got a ton right immediately - just firing on all cylinders. A world with lore that is shown not told, a main character with history with other characters presented, and pick up and play enjoyable gameplay. It’s a lot to ask for in video games to get all these things right so quickly (especially in 2006). It’s straightforward and is a tight 10 hour campaign that leaves you wanting to see more and outside of the last boss (I hate that train section), has few faults. Gears of War 2 and 3 added variety and larger scope but Gears of War was an excellent foundation.
GEARS TACTICS (2020) 3 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancers
I played the first hour of Gears Tactics when it came out and said, “this is cool - I’ll come back to it.” It took me about 5 years to circle back to Gears Tactics and yeah, it is pretty great. Focusing on Gabe Diaz, the father of Kait Diaz (main character in Gears 4 and 5), and how he got caught up in a greater COG conspiracy and met Reyna Torres (Kait’s mom). The shift from over-the-shoulder cover shooter to a top down tactics game is fluid and works well for this universe. Using teammates to take down a Brumak in phases was satisfying because of how long it takes and the strategy you need to employ. Unfortunately, the game begins to drag when filler missions take up your time. These missions feel randomly generated, they lack narrative need and are a time sink. That said, Tactics is an excellent proof of concept for other games like this in the franchise. I felt the same way about Halo Wars and then they knocked it out of the park with Halo Wars 2. The cool thing I found out is that Gears Tactics was first a board game idea on a grid with character cards (think Dungeons and Dragons adjacent). And the story elements are lacking in material - it just feels like they pivoted to make a game and didn’t have enough time. But if a Gears Tactics 2 is ever announced, ur boy it gonna be playing on Day 1.
GEARS 5 (2019) 3 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancers
When Gears 5 arrived on Gamepass in 2019, I was excited to play it. Gears 4, which we will get to, was disappointing but I was sure Gears 5 would correct the sins of the previous entry. I was right…to an extent. The shakeup of the gameplay The Coalition introduced was refreshing - the hub world nature of Acts 3 and 4 and the mobility of the skiff was a blast. The areas felt a tad empty but the optional objectives that gave Jack upgrades were well worth it to seek out. It didn’t feel like filler. The problem was the story and Acts 2 and 3 are the strongest. When we get to the sand-area of Act 4, the story devolves into GET BIG LASER AGAIN. The final Act lacks imagination and the confrontation with Reyna is anticlimactic. I forgive Gears 5 for its sins more so than other Gears-fans but on returning to it this past Fall, its issues were increasingly apparent. I think that’s because I have focused on this series so intensely that it was easier for me years ago to enjoy Gears 5 passively. But I do like this game and I do think The Coalition tried to listen to what we didn’t like about Gears 4. Mixed results, for sure!
GEARS 4 (2016) 2 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancers
Gears 4 is what happens when you take a Gears-game and strip out all of its excellent set pieces, engaging characters and memorable environments. Like the Halo series when 343 took over for Bungie, The Coalition had big shoes to fill from Epic and Cliffy B. This transition would have changes but I guess we all hoped it wouldn’t be changes so…uninventive. The addition of quirky dialogue where characters have a quip every 5 minutes made the shift in tone feel disingenuous and patronizing. Sure, Gears could be funny but not in the way the writers now wanted which felt like a Marvel-film or Uncharted. On top of that, Gears 4 has the worst opening Act of the series. A complete drag for the player as you move through a COG shelter. There are hints of great world building in the background like the rebuilding of New Ephyra, the need for children to be born/protected and how important crops are (my goddamn tomatoes!). Baird creating robots to be police, Anya and Marcus having a kid, and a new Prime Minister are ingredients for decent Gears-lore. But boy, they dropped the ball with JD - what a weiner. How do 2 amazingly badass people create such a loser for a kid?
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GEARS JUDGEMENT (2013) 2 out of 5 Chainsaw Lancers
I will say this about Gears Judgement - it’s the best looking Gears game on the 360. The amount of color that does pop with this late console cycle title was great for the series at the time. But… I hate that I dislike Judgement. The developer behind the title, People Can Fly, is a studio I like and I am fond of their other projects (Painkiller and Bulletstorm) but this game is such an uninspired mess. The gameplay shifted from a narrative focus and set pieces to essentially a single player horde mode. The player must complete “rooms” of enemies before continuing. It works for a game like Painkiller but here, it feels like half a Gears-game. I could see it being more enjoyable with the co-op campaign but even still.
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That’s it! I can put Gears of War to rest for a bit (unless I write up any of the remaining books). I am excited for the next release of E-Day whenever that arrives. I think fans are excited to go back to the series’ roots and hopefully that gothic vibe. We shall see! It’s been wonderful to learn almost everything about the series in the last year. If you made it this far, thank you!